Baby in a Bathtub

Why You Should Opt for a Gender Neutral Baby Shower

Babies can be so exciting.  Pregnancy and childbirth are a right of passage from maidenhood to motherhood.  We celebrate it when we can because we are welcoming a new baby to the world as well as the mother as she enters a new phase of her life.  The purpose and structure of a baby shower have changed over the years especially with the introduction of Pinterest.  Let me explain to you why you should opt for a gender neutral baby shower.

It adds a different level of excitement…

When your guests don’t know the gender of the baby, there will be a lot of buzz during the entire shower.  Everyone will talk about about old wives tales, how many boys/girls are in the family, and what they think you will be having.  A few of the baby showers I’ve gone to, now, have had the old wives tales on display with “boy” or “girl” circled to indicate which is true for the mother’s pregnancy.  I even had it at my shower!  It’s just fun to experience that different kind of excitement.

It’s an actual surprise…

There are so few people anymore who actually choose to NOT know the sex of the baby before it/s born.  When I was talking to a neighbor, years back at this point, she told me something that kind of stuck.  “The sex of the baby is one of the last true surprises we get to experience in this world.”  I don’t remember the last time I’ve heard something that profoundly true.  How truly exciting it must be for dad to walk out to the family and say, “It’s a ….”  I honestly can’t imagine.  P.S.  We knew the gender of our girls for both pregnancies.

Intimacy for you and your partner…

My husband and I knew the gender of our daughters but did not announce it until the shower.  It gave us a period of time that the two of us were able to celebrate as just us.  We got to share an incredible piece of information with each other without our families bombarding us with their excitement.  Now don’t get me wrong, we were very excited to experience their excitement as well but knowing that we were the only ones to know, it added another level of intimacy to our relationship during the pregnancy.

Check out our Gender Reveal Paint Battle to see how we broke the news to our oldest daughter.

Gifts that you need…

When you register for your shower, you and your partner will probably be hit the with harsh reality that babies are EXPENSIVE! When you have a gender neutral baby shower, (and you do not register for items that would indicate the sex if you already know) you are more likely to receive the items you actually need.  If your guests know the gender of the baby, they are more likely to purchase an adorable outfit because they just couldn’t pass it up.  While clothes are always appreciated, your baby will also need the items on your registry.

You aren’t limited to pink and blue…

Me personally, I’m not a fan of the pink and blue baby showers.  Do you know why?  Because I’m a little bit of a hippie and don’t think that we should be imposing gender roles on babies before they are even born.  And besides…there are sooo many cute gender neutral baby shower ideas out there.  Like the Vintage Lamb Themed Neutral Baby Shower thrown by Jennifer for her daughter-in-law, Taylor.  Or my own Purple and Teal Gender Neutral Baby Shower organized by my good friends Tina, Megan, and Jackie.

I’m sure that there are other reasons that you may choose not to center your baby shower around the gender of your baby.  If there are, let me know what your reasons are.


  • I absolutely feel both men and women should be at the baby shower. When I was pregnant, I didn’t have the option to know the baby’s gender. We used the position of the baby to know. I could never tell. haha I bet keeping it a secret was a little hard. I can’t keep a secret like that! Good luck to you all.

  • Shauna Bellonby

    Im 7 months pregnant today and we haven’t even considered a baby shower. This is the first girl grandchild in both of our families, so we know that it would be a big deal, but we don’t want to be overwhelmed with things that we don’t need either. This is a great post! Thank you for sharing!

  • Laura

    I love love love this! So important to get the gifts you need rather than a bunch of unnecessary stuff!

  • Ashley Stephenson

    Love this idea! I don’t know what we will do when we get pregnant!

  • shootingstarsmag

    I do think it’s a nice idea! I have a friend whose first was a complete surprise until the birth, so her shower was all neutral (even though people still got clothes, etc/).


  • Kristi

    I did not find out with our 3rd child but I knew it was a girl. It’s funny how sometimes you just know. We did not have a shower until after she was born. Baby neutral items make it easy to flip flop between different genders of children but man I enjoy the girly stuff. It’s so cute!

  • Erin Elizabeth Haugerud

    This makes sense! Great idea!!

  • We didn’t find out the sex of either of my kids and I loved it! I am totally in the “last true surprise camp.” And from a practical standpoint, you’re totally right. At our baby shower our friends and family gifted us so generously with the necessities which was really helpful. And then the cute clothes came later. 🙂

  • Marie Ndiaye

    Great point about the gender neutral registry essentials. My son had more clothes than we knew what to do with and I was scrambling last minute for things I knew I’d actually need.

  • Lisa Roe

    We have three children and only found out the sex of the baby once. After an ultrasound very late in the pregnancy, we were told we were having a boy. We have three daughters! So there’s another reason to keep your baby shower gender neutral.

  • Sophie Wailes

    I don’t have children but I very strongly believe I will want to know the gender in advance. I like the idea of a surprise but I dislike having everything in cream. Of course I could change my mind and embrace the excitement of life before then 😛